It is so wonderful to be back in Scotland with Kirk after this crazy whirlwind! I realize, after a lot of prayer and encouragement from many of you, that God had purposes behind this time that we are still discovering. To sum it up, here is what we have come to appreciate, so far, about the visa frustrations:
1. Receive graciously. Being back at home left me aware of my needs- It is very difficult to parent without a spouse around, and I have a lot of compassion for those who do it regularly. My parents, Kirk's parents, and countless others willingly inconvenienced themselves to take us to appointments, shopping for winter clothes, and coffee breaks. I was blessed with massages, chiropractic adjustments (a Christian chiro who actually prayed over me for wellness and wholeness during a time when everything, body and mind, was out of alignment), and even a trip to the zoo with Meg and her sweet boys. While we were being loved-on and pampered in the U.S., several new friends cooked meals for Kirk and invited him into their homes. I am so thankful for that!
2. Fear is a cancer of the mind. Throughout our month apart, I was tempted to fear, period. You name it, I worried about it... Financial fears, health-related fears, safety... A lot of that was brought to light, because this short season drew me to pray more than usual. I sensed The Lord drawing me to His word for comfort and encouragement, and it caused this overwhelming sense of peace to settle in. It's such a hard concept to trust in God's mysterious plan for our lives, but He promises that He goes before us, and that He won't forsake us in the middle of whatever mess or celebration we encounter. Being uncomfortable circumstance-wise, whatever it looks like for each individual, is actually the best classroom!
3. Just Be. There were days when it seemed like nothing was getting accomplished on the visa-front. These days, at first, stressed me out, because I didn't want Kirk to feel like I wasn't trying. He never thought that, but does that really ever stop me from thinking these crazy things?! Ha! As the trip extended, I just decided to enjoy the wonderful blessings of watching family member after family member enjoy our baby. We spent several days with some very dear friends, too. Oh, how perfectly planned is God's timing!
4. Jesus truly loves us and speaks our own individual love languages. Kirk was frequently led to sing songs and play his guitar- he didn't realize until the songs were over that God was speaking directly to the areas that were bothering him. Jesus specifically ministered to me by allowing me to experience the fall weather that I've loved since I was five. Micah and I even went to a pumpkin patch! We know that Jesus knows our needs, but our experiences this past month suggest that He also knows our desires and cares about them!
5. Relationships are the "better thing". Before leaving Scotland, I was preoccupied with fixing every little asthetically unpleasing part of our apartment. When Micah and I came back, I relaxed and was welcomed to a beautiful place that is "home" all its own simply because of who lives there. Thanks, Jesus, for lovingly showing me how ridiculous I can be sometimes :).
So, here we are- back in this place that I appreciate significantly more than before. I am excited to meet new friends and pick up where we left off.
Here's to "Scotland, it's nice to meet you", Part II.
I have returned feeling more free and content as the mystery unfolds.
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